When you step up from a Mercedes E-Class to an S-Class, the gulf in quality is instantly apparent—from the interior to the drive and powertrain. But when you move from an S-Class to a Maybach S-Class, the differences are… minimal. The price gap, however, is anything but.

Then you step up from a Maybach S-Class to a Rolls-Royce Phantom, and suddenly the Maybach feels and rides like a toy pedal car.

That’s the difference in class. It’s not something you need to talk about or aspire to—you simply see it and feel it. So when Mercedes released the slogan “true class runs deep,” I found myself saying aloud, “shut up Mercedes, just shut up Mercedes.”

Mercedes positions the Maybach S-Class as a bespoke, tailored alternative to Bentley or Rolls-Royce. But it has never truly been able to compete with the peerless offerings of the British luxury marques. The S-Class is—and always will be—a step below both.

And no matter how hard they try, the Maybach S-Class remains a step below the very best of British. I’ll even concede, quietly, zee-Germans may own Bentley and Rolls-Royce now—but they haven’t diluted what makes them untouchable.

Maybach has long tried to present itself as the pinnacle of Mercedes ownership, yet even mafiosi, plutocrats, dictators, and drug dealers tend to prefer the bog standard S-Class. They know the truth: the Maybach S-Class is essentially an extended S-Class in disguise.

The only reason to buy a Maybach S-Class is if you can’t afford a Rolls-Royce—and that, ultimately, is the real difference in class.

Evening all.