When I read the press release I thought it was a joke, a hoax. Fake news! Land Rover Discovery wins the “Dog-Friendly Car of the Year” award. What the fuck? I thought the Discovery was an SUV, not a car? But the award is actually real. This turd of an award is problematic as much as it is laugh-out-awkwardly-loud. It is a pitiful and embarrassing award to receive.

Land Rover must be happy. Award ceremonies are all about marketing and events. You set up an award ceremony, you generate sponsorship, make a bit of money, and generate publicity. Everyone wins.

So, you have established this award ceremony. The next step to take is to devise award categories. So it’s the usual car of the year, quilted car seat of the year stuff. I am sure you know how the awards industry works.

But your award ceremony needs gravitas. If Daily Car Blog were to set up an annual award we would probably get arrested and deported. Awards need to be backed up with an aura of respectability both individual and corporate. You need name recognition.

That’s where News UK comes into the story. The phone hacking News UK is a cabal of news media brands consisting of The Sun, The Times and The Sunday Times. All respectable news organizations in their own right. The Sun is never far from controversy.

The Times is pompous… and never far from controversy and the Sunday Times is… just boring as hell. These respectable publications have been boycotted by Liverpool and Manchester. The list of lies and offense they collectively cause is endless.

From advocating for the pre-emptive military strikes, the Iraq War, to comparing Mike Ashley with North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un. The Times is responsible and respectable reading these days.

What the Dog-Friendly Car of the Year award is… is a patriotic emergency award, nothing more than showering pity on a car brand hit by a sales slump.

The intent is to help Land Rover generate positive publicity to hopefully boost sales. In turn, Land Rover will be forever grateful.

Land Rover is facing Brexit uncertainty, a financial loss of major proportions and is publicizing an award given to it by a publication that advocated for Brexit, The Sun.

It’s total madness and insanity.

And that’s why you, Land Rover Discovery, you are the worst dog-friendly SUV of the week.