As if owning a Rolls Royce wasn’t exclusive enough, the maker of ultra-luxury houses on wheels has found a new way to make luxury even more unattainable. Behold LIMITED EDITION! model—because who needs regular editions, right? Clearly, the notion of cruising around in a Rolls Royce, basking in the aura of exclusivity, was just too mainstream. So, naturally, the company had to spice things up with the Rolls Royce Ekleipsis Private Collection, because who needs ordinary when you can have a car that’s rarer than a unicorn at a cosplay grunge festival?

In a stroke of ironic brilliance, the Rolls Royce Ekleipsis Private Edition, derived from the exclusive Black Edition trim, aims to embody the essence of a total solar eclipse, conveniently named after the Greek word for disappearance. One can only imagine the profound inspiration that struck the marketing department during what was undoubtedly a rigorous “team bonding day,” where the team, in all likelihood, bonded over a few pints down at the pub.

The Rolls Royce Ekleipsis Private Collection, where darkness meets more darkness on the outside and inside, adorned with orange trim elements to symbolize the profound significance of the colour orange—meaning not included. But fear not, dear customer, for while I may lack enthusiasm for unravelling the mysterious importance of this shade, the 25 limited edition Ekleipsis models have been snatched up like concert tickets for a legendary band that no one has heard of.

Under the hood, or perhaps we should say under the shroud of mystery, lies a slightly modified 6.75-litre, 592bhp V12 engine, ensuring that all four wheels roll with an air of indifference. Because who needs to understand the deep, existential meaning of orange when you’ve got 592 horses subtly disagreeing with the concept of explanations? It’s not just a car; it’s a masterpiece in the art of apathetic elegance.

Naturally, every Rolls Royce is meticulously trimmed to meet the most exacting and luxurious bespoke standards such as a bespoke timepiece inset with a dazzling 0.5-carat diamond. Nothing says “irony” like stating the obvious about a brand synonymous with extravagance. It’s almost as surprising as discovering that water is wet and the sky is occasionally blue. Ah, the marvels of stating the unequivocal in the realm of opulence.

Price? You tell me.